Hello.. This post is a special request from Ms. Wu.. I will post something that have mingled in my mind lately.
Em.. Do you believe this quote? "You won't love campus life if you've ever felt the niceness of school life. You'll never get the fun like you have in school."
I do believe, know why?
However, not every 'why' can be answered clearly. I can just say the fact that in school,everyone seems to say the real things and you can easily differ a friend or a lover. Contrarily, in campus life everything is like bogus! It makes you confuse about whom or when to trust.
Check my case now.
Like what I told in my last entry, I do have a good senior (wu) to share with, he's been so good to me.
We text each other frequently and that makes me feel that we have a close friend relationship.
You guys now think that I am happy in this situation,right?
Fact is no, I wanna emphasize that I am actually not in my comfort zone. The problem is that one of my friend (let's call her K) love him so much and she always tells me whatever conversations she had with him. She looks extremely happy. While for wu, he's like so easy going with that.
I don't understand what he's exactly thinking about. At this time, I can accept the fact that junior-senior love story is just a usual case.
But again, things went even more complicated when I was sitting with some of my friends to chat about days and made jokes like who is having crush with who and who'll soon be in a relationship. The surprising thing is that suddenly one of my friends said like "She,J is going to be in a relationship soon with a senior." Afterward I found out the senior is Wu. Maybe it's just a joke to bother J. Nonetheless, few days afterwards, I read the same conversation at BBM's status between J and friends. I don't know whether I should believe it. When I ask wu, he answered: "Don't take it seriously, it's just a joke that her friends make and besides, she still can't forget her EX." Then I tried to forget it, but can I really act like it's nothing?
hmm.. or you think that I am jealous?
nope, maybe not yet? hahahaha.. who knows?
that why if it is all real, what should I do? since, we've been very good friends and we have shared uncountable jokes. He often jokes like "Oh, I am interested in you." or sth like that.
at first yah it's okay, but it is getting quite often now. and I afraid someday I will take it seriously. -_-"
I cant imagine what will happen that time. and I think he never take it serious though some of my near friends who know it said he does really have crush on me.
he ever said that I am being prioritized than others because he can freely talk anything at anytime with random topics, like hobbies,lecturers and foods. he said so when I complained the things happening between I,my friend,and J became more complicated and I have to set stay farther. Because I meet my friend and J everyday and it feels like I'm the third person between them.
Now, because all of these, our conversation is getting tenser than we used to have before. I can really feel this uneasiness in our friendship.
So,what is your conclusion? Should I move forward (act like nothing happens)? or move backward (make distances)?
